Please help artist, philosopher, a mystic, psychology major, actor, spiritual teacher and healer, hopeful polymath, overall creative-entrepreneur, and queer black female gain financial stability and mental~emotional wellness.
Hi, my name is “T Solstice” (this is not my name, I am trying to maintain some kind of anonymity for I fear for my safety while sharing this). Please if you speak publicly or share anything about this use the nickname “T Solstice” always. I am fighting to hopefully escape an abusive situation, and regain my psychological, physical, and spiritual safety!
Countless adult women and men suffer in silence to keep themselves safe and sane through the horrific circumstances of domestic abuse and controlling family members. We now live in a time where the world has placed healing, love, and growth at the forefront of essential human necessity. Several brave and beautiful people who once suffered alone have begun to ignite an inspiring movement, breaking their silence and asking for help. I am one of those humans~I am not a slave to my fears and I am asking for your help. Those of you who have struggled on your own, know how detrimental this kind of trauma can be to a young woman and how debilitating it is. I’m sure some of you know that depression, anxiety, and PTSD impact one’s ability to be a healthy functioning human being in society…
If I could simplify the experience of scapegoating and narcissistic abuse I would say; it feels a lot like a dark weight of all the pain, anger, and self-hate others are responsible for that you have been nonconsensually held responsible for. It feels like when a mob decides to turn back and face you and hurt you instead of whatever has caused them pain. It is your external reality and internal reality battling against each other, trying to find the narrative that makes the most sense(but none of the realities make sense, so in a way you’ve lost your mind or you’re faced with intense cognitive dissonance, dissociative episodes, and panic attacks!). In a scenario like this, you feel incredibly isolated regardless of the other relationships you might have in your life. The idea that your mere being is a fault (a baseless claim though) sticks with you and at some point, you truly believe that you are worthless. This is when your depression strikes, your anxiety worsens, you numb yourself through addictions, you self harm or consider suicide as “the only way out”, you struggle so so much to find the light again…and all I have as “support” since the pandemic began is the humans who torture me the most. This does not help my healing even in the slightest; I assume I’ve made progress with my deepest wounds but then someone strikes at me with harsh words or cruel behavior and then I’m back where I’ve always been mentally. It’s all riddled with unfathomable confusion and toxicity. I get no nurturing from my mother/my aunts/my uncle/my grandparents etc. None seem to care nearly enough about my wellbeing to try to hear my pain or help when I reach my hand out begging for it to stop.
I hope and pray that enough of you hear me out as I send this message to you. I am struggling to see if there is a lighter ending to this emotional pain, I really struggle to convince myself that suicide isn’t the only option left for me. It seems that it is just because I can’t seem to make anything else work, I am depleted and with very few resources available to me…this is why I am begging for help here like this.
No matter the size of your contribution, each donation, and word of encouragement is a heartfelt expression of support, a hand that says, “We care about you and we care about your struggle.” The struggle not only to survive but to thrive! To emerge from trauma and live joyfully, healthily, and peacefully! And this can only be made possible by YOUR donations, which will not only help fund my relocation to safety, but give me access to all the tools necessary to pursue my career as a young black woman, and enroll myself in quality mental health services. gogetfunding.com
